To My Little One

As I sit here now writing this, your daddy and I are praying for you. We haven’t met you yet, but we’re so excited for the day when you will finally arrive.
It’s been a tough road. Getting to that day where we get to hold you in our arms isn’t always easy or fun. There are many sleepless nights, many nights spent crying in hopelessness, and many days spent lost in thoughts and prayers for you.
I’m sure there will be times when I need to look back on these nights and remember. During those nights when you’re crying because you’re colicky or hungry or had a bad dream; when Daddy and I have bags under our eyes because you couldn’t sleep if we weren’t rubbing your back. We’ll need to be reminded of how fiercely we prayed for exactly that. The poopy diapers, the relentless screaming, the Mommy’s-freaking-out-and-doesn’t-know-what-to-do illnesses. All of it. Because we also prayed for the smiles and laughs, the snuggles, the Eskimo kisses, and all of the good times, too. The beauty that is you. We prayed for it, and we were blessed with you, and we wouldn’t change a thing.
And know this: you are so, unbelievably loved. And not just by Mommy and Daddy. Nana and Pawpaw, Grandma and Granddaddy, they prayed for you, too, and love you to the ends of the universe and back a million times.
When the day comes that you step out into the big, bad world (or even the day that Mom grounds you and you’re angry about it), remember how loved you are, little one. The world can be scary. Rejection, heartbreak, failure – it all happens out there. But through it all, Daddy and I love you. We will always love you.
And even though the day will come when we may not be praying for you to come along anymore, we will still pray for you. Every single day and every single night. We will pray for your health and your happiness. We will pray that one day (far, far down the road, please…) you’ll know the happiness we feel when we look at your sweet face.
You’re on your way. I know it; I can feel it in my soul. Your precious little soul is looking down on us and saying, “That’s my mommy and daddy. I want to be with them.” And we want you with us, too, little darling. We will hold you and love you and protect you from all that we can.
i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
                                                      i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)
-e.e. cummings
We’ll carry your heart with us for as long as we live.
Mommy and Daddy

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